Tuesday, February 14, 2017

President Trump Promotes President Steve Bannon

Those in the "lamestream" media who keep calling White House Alt-White leader Steve Bannon "President Bannon" are peddling fake news once again. This from the real President, Donald J. Trump, who proclaimed, "I am the real President, and I'm doing a tremendous job."

But that was not all POTUS told us. "As of today, Valentine's Day, I'm promoting Steve Bannon to UberPresident. That's big league, and he's amazing."

UberPresident Bannon, spitting at the assembled members of the press, wasted no time in letting them know who is in charge now. "I'm in charge now!" he said, scratching the three-day beard growth that covered both of his chins.

Note to media: Donald Trump does NOT like to be called UnderPresident Trump. Ivanka told him it sounds vaguely gayish. Or goyish. The translation from the KGB's recording devices in the Oval Office could be to blame for this confusion.

Followers of UberPresident Bannon can order their brown shirts from Ivanka's clothing line, "Manly Ready to Wear." Order now from Nordstrom's and get the fire sale price.

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